Christopher
Johnson IV
Writer/Producer/Director
Writer/Producer/Director
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Christopher
Johnson IV
Writer/Producer/Director |
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| Christopher Johnson IV: Archives | |
| GABRIEL BACK IN BINGHAMTON & A is A Okay, I know the only details you’re probably interested in here are the ones about how the film is coming along and what stage the financing is at and such… well, as I have been learning this week, patience is the most important quality during these calm moments before the storm. So be patient, I’ll have some amazing updates coming soon. Today my beloved cat Gabriel has found another home in the lives of Erica Downey and Daniel Kazinski. They are lovely people and I could not be more pleased about this wonderful development. They live in my home town and I am very pleased that I will be able to visit them all at the same time. I cannot wait to see Gabriel again… it has been too long. Thank you both for being the people you are and making Gabriel’s home so divinely comfortable. Another monumental rung in the ladder of my life has been reached and I have been enlightened by the awesome (and I mean awesome in the truest meaning of the word, such that I am awe-struck) mind that is Ayn Rand. I finished “Atlas Shrugged” last night and it has helped me to cement my philosophy and code of conduct for my life. How I operated previously without such a concrete quantification of that which I have practiced for the majority of my life is an interesting study of instinct and gut feelings. Clarity has never been more present to me than now and I am profoundly empowered by the understanding of this philosophy. A is A. (A nod to Aristotle.) Who is John Galt? Every person who acknowledges that truth is the accurate acknowledgement of what is real… that A is A and cannot be anything else, everyone who utilizes the best within them to bring about their own happiness and loves their life such that they will not live for the sake of another or ask another to live for their sake. Be productive and earn your living using the best within yourself, truthfully and with conviction, not apology. Thank you Ayn Rand. That which should be self evident is often lost in the hustle and bustle of living to pay the bills or to make someone else happy or to finish that which you feel you have to so that you can actually start living the way you want to live. It seems clearer than ever that the most important thing that you can do to save the integrity of your life this very minute is to live your life for you, right now, here today. This is not a license to go into debt in any way, financially, or emotionally, but a charge to eliminate the debt of your life so that the only thing you owe is to yourself: the charge of fulfilling your own happiness at the expense of no other. I’m not preaching here, I’m speaking to no one but myself, and those who care to read and consider what is being said here of your own free will. Once you realize that you are the source of your own destiny and you alone are responsible for fulfilling it, you can then do just that. I now realize that everything that I choose to accomplish and is humanly possibly and within the conception and belief of my mind, IS possible. There is a distinction between thinking you believe and truly believing. Living a belief and seeking that belief are not the same. Ultimately you earn what you get every day of your life. If you are not happy with the crop of today, ask yourself what seeds you have planted to reap such an unsatisfactory yield. You will never stop working in this lifetime. Life is about constant movement. When you stop moving you rot and die. Sound harsh? It’s true. From the most physical representation of a rotting train in an abandoned yard to the person who gives up on their body and mind. If you stop seeing the beauty around you, let your passions fall away or succumb to the idea that the work is too hard and the result too little, remember that you are sealing your own fate and altering the path of your own self-fulfilling prophecy. Your body and mind are your most valuable assets and they are there to make you happy and grant you your most grandiose desires. You choose whether or not the effort of earning them is worth it, not anyone or anything else. This entry is a love letter to myself, a realization and a reminder that I love who and what I am and that my hear pumps for my life every second and that my eyes see, my ears hear and my body moves me every second of ever minute of every hour of every day of my life for me alone. I choose what to move for and what not to move for. I choose what to look at and what to disregard, what to hear or turn a deaf ear to. The tears in my eyes are a result of my deep passion for every breath I take and my gratitude to the body that allows me life and movement. I will mark my own words as a promise to myself that the moment I leave this place, I will leave no debt, financial or emotional on any one or any establishment. That I will dedicate my life to the realization of wonderful experiences and help those who are willing to work hard to find the path to earning their own rewards. This is not a gift to anyone, but a selfish fulfillment that will bring me happiness, a happiness resulting from seeing the hard work of others pay off for them as mine does for me. I am not jealous of others’ fine achievements, nor do I view them as a barometer to measure my own achievements, but instead, am proud to be in the company of thinkers and achievers that challenge me to think even harder and achieve even more than I do on my own. Some may wonder what would motivate me to publish such things on the internet. Why would I assume that anyone would be interested? Well, I don’t. And I don’t care. If you are still reading, you have discovered a value in this that fulfills some need in yourself. That has nothing to do with me. My hope is that people aspire to the best within themselves and their own highest idea for themselves. We can do better here; much better. Live and lead by example. Some people have to unlearn that which society has taught so effectively: That you are subject to the generosity of the machine and live at the discretion of the system. That is as true as you wish it to be. All answers are not easy and all tasks not without challenge. Think the best of yourself and find the courage to see reality for what it is, that A is always A. Once you acknowledge reality for what it is, you will have found the truth and you can always operate from a position of power when you are dealing with reality. Your response to truth can be truth. Your response to untruth can never be truth, and the only salvation you can find in any situation will only come in the form of a truthful response to reality. Fake nothing including your own perception of what is right in front of you. To do so is to invite impotence into your mind. For my part, I view that as the most deadly of poisons and my body is far too good to me to turn over to the wolves of that corruption. I view my body and mind as a diamond that I will constantly polish to reveal the most sparkling of aspects. The polishing is never finished. This is not arrogance, and I do not view myself as “higher than-thou.” Simply put I am not above anyone except perhaps in the acknowledgement of my own value to myself. I have not always been at this place in my life. I have not always loved myself. For a good portion of my life, I have been filled with a destructive self loathing invisible to most close to me. I did not turn to drugs or alcohol to destroy that which was good within myself, but isolated my soul and emotions to the confinement of a stoic isolationism that would not allow me to acknowledge the best that life itself has to offer. The worst and only true prison that can destroy the hope of a human being is the prison of ones own mind. Self hatred is antithetical to the point of existence and therefore endorses only death in my view. Happiness is the goal to which all energy is in some way expended and the only goal that stands above all others as the pinnacle of existence: Happiness at no one’s expense but your own under your own motive power; the truthful and logical destination of an inviolate mind’s journey. So to you and your journey, I wish you the courage to find the truth in your life and the clarity to answer in kind. Find the value in yourself and polish your diamond until you sparkle as brightly as is humanly possible. Not in relation to those around you, but in relation to your own highest idea of whom and what you can be. CDJ Johnson on April 30th, 2006 |
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